Posted by: ButterflyMoms | June 26, 2010


Our family including Daniel and Nicolie on Daniel's special day! 🙂

There were two pieces of wedding advice I got when I was getting married a few years ago that really HIT THE SPOT! I sooooooooo wish I could remember who said it!!!  It’s that mommy brain that won’t go away!!!! (If you’re a mom you know what I mean ;))

At one point all the planning was becoming overwhelming. We already had my stepson Christopher, Mialotta was less than a year old and (no one knew at the time) but I was pregnant again with our Sophia. All that with work and planning the wedding I had in my childhood mind was making things very FULL, as in STRESS + FULL = STRESSFUL!!!!  Not exactly the equation you want for your wedding!!! In the middle of all these expensive little decisions that make or break a wedding someone cut through the chaos with these words, ” A wedding can either be a PRODUCTION or a MEANING + FULL = MEANINGFUL event.” (pause)

WOW! That comment gave us both amazing clarity (my future husband and I , not you and I  😉 Can you tell I’m feeling “funny” today – that’s because the Universe has a HUGE sense of humor. Look for it and laugh often. But I digress….). Before we heard it we were in the storm feeling a large, overwhelming sense of FEAR. After that comment we felt as if the house had landed and we could finally feel the ground again….and it felt grounding (pun intended! 😉

We realized that the most important thing was to keep the MEANING of the event alive. I think everyone who was there had a pretty fantastic time and that is what we wanted, a good time had by all, an event that produced a lot of Ohhhhhh’s and Ahhhhhh’s, tears and cheers, and that “I know I’m tired but I don’t want to go home” feeling! You know what I’m sayin’! 😉

The other bit of fabulous advice we got was to counter the feeling that with events like this it all goes way to fast. You could easily describe it as MONTHS of PLANNING FOLLOWED BY A BIG BLUR OF A  DAY. We were advised several times during the event to stand next to each other in a corner, holding hands (I added that part ;)) and quietly observe what our love had attracted and what our planning had created. It was soooooooo incredibly satisfying to SEE, HEAR, FEEL the people we love around us laughing, eating, dancing, drinking, talking, dancing some more. Smiles were the outfit of the day and everyone wore them effortlessly. 🙂 These two tips made our whole day EXTRA special because it allowed us to truly GET BACK TO BASICS, to get back to what is REALLY important, to the things that MAKE or BLUR a life.

In raising children two of the complaints most of us have are that they grow up so fast and that we are so busy. If you apply these two simple rules to how you raise your children they will act like a major luxurious grounding of your life! Let’s take the one about pulling away from your day and simply observing. The cool thing about this one is that you can do it alone or invite your kids to join you so that they can learn this amazing tool for how to enjoy your day.

Yesterday I was talking to a very old friend of mine, Albert, who said he used to sometimes just go across the street from his house and look at his kids playing in the yard and the house and his cars and give himself the room to say, “WOW! I’m a lucky man!” It is moments like that MAKE A LIFE! Take time a few times each day to PULL BACK and TAKE IT IN! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! MMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmm! 🙂

The second part has to do with “BEING” BUSY. There really is NO “BEING” BUSY, it’s more like “DOING” BUSY because BUSY is a sign that you are out of alignment. Note that FULL and BUSY are not the same thing, although people lump them together. For example, which would you rather have, a FULL LIFE or a BUSY one? Well, if you are IN a lot of pain and have not realized that you can actually CHOOSE to let that go and MOVE THROUGH it then you might answer BUSY, but otherwise FULL means JUST ENOUGH. BUSY, means so much that it’s OVERFLOWING. Red wine can be delicious but overfill that elegant wine glass of yours and those stains on your favorite pants help us brilliantly demonstrates this point, dontchathink? 😉

The point of the second point, (the point of the point ;)) is the same thing as the wedding advice. Your life can be a PRODUCTION where you try to cram all the things you SHOULD be doing, living your life comparing yourself to others and not checking in with YOU!  Some people call it “keepin’ up with the Joneses”. How is that workin’ for ya???? Huh???? Huh???? Don’t worry. It’s not working for anyone else either. Some of us can just FAKE IT better than others! 😉 TRUE DAT!!!! :)!!! That is one choice. The other choice is to CHOOSE to make it MEAN + FULL = MEANINGFUL! The choice is yours.  We attract the life we think we deserve. I offer you the chance to give yourself the permission to be open and actually CHOOSE a better life! By “better” I mean one in which YOU live according to what brings YOU JOY, as compared to NO ONE ELSE!

Take that in for a loooooooong moment. How does that feel to you? The answers to this will help you shift your life into a more meaningful one. 🙂 My work here today is done!!! 🙂




PS As some of you know, I’m on an incredible journey following my life’s mission and passion, being the FIRE THAT IGNITES PEOPLES’ SOULS. Oprah is starting a new network and she has put out a contest to find a talkshow host. My Show Idea is called THE MARIA SHOW. I ask you to please go here :), see my video 🙂 and vote for me as many times as you can :)…

Also a really cool article was written about this journey yesterday. If you want to check it out here it is….

You can help me on my quest by:

1. VOTE for THE MARIA SHOW (as many times as you can each day until July 3)

2. SHARE with family and friends. One ButterflyMom, Rebecca, is even hosting a Wine and Click Party in honor of the cause where moms bring their laptops and vote! Sooo cool! Use your creativity. THANKS REBECCA!!!

3. POST on your FB, website, Twitter, MySpace, blog,…..

Here is the link again:

I hope you come play with the other BUTTERFLYMOMS and ME!!!! THANK YOU SOOOOOOOOO MUCH!


  1. Love, LOVE! ABSOLUTLEY LOVE!! the message here Maria. It is great when you come across something that reminds you what you know but forget to do. Thank you. ~ and good luck with the Oprah video – I am off to vote a few more times….

  2. You are right about the “There really is NO “BEING” BUSY, it’s more like “DOING” BUSY because BUSY is a sign that you are out of alignment.” And I love the wine glass image!

  3. Good luck with the video! We are both moms and have an online artisan food marketplace, ( Maybe we can be one of your first guests!

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