Posted by: ButterflyMoms | May 6, 2011


Dearest Beautiful ButterflyMoms,

Sometimes it seems that life is stripping you raw. No matter what you try, things that are a deep part of our life fall apart, go “wrong”, break, and/or simply disappear. I have noticed patterns in my life where this happens. I’m in one of those very patterns. It started with my son Christopher accidently spilling water next to my computer. As that glass of water fell, my life’s trajectory shifted into a new direction and I entered into the LAND OF YOU-ARE-ABOUT-TO-LOSE-A-WHOLE-BUNCH-OF –VERY –IMPORTANT-DATA-AND-SPEND-A-LOT-OF-MONEY-AND-TIME-HOPELESSLY-TRYING-TO-FIX-IT! After three weeks of trying to recover it, my hard drive is being flown to Wisconsin to see if they can recover my original mother board (how appropriate with Mother’s Day this weekend). The computer I bought less than 2 weeks ago had a corrupt operating system and I spent a large part of yesterday at Apple with the technicians, talking to my computer guy, looking for files…..Believe I COULD go on and on around this but let’s move to a bird’s eye view of the situation, shall we.

It is PRETTY obvious that I’m being STRIPPED RAW of my technology. I can get into my head very easily. I know I’m doing this because I get into those LIFE MODELS of “WORK-CHORES-KIDS-TV-SLEEP” (not in that order). I carve out very little time to hang out with friends or to read or anything like that. As much as I dislike to admit it, my GREAT TRANQUILIZER is my television and BOY DO I USE IT TO MEDICATE myself. Sure it’s entertaining but when you are lacking sleep and you choose TV over sleep like I do almost EVERY night I know there is an issue. I know I could spend my time more wisely. I know my life would shift in ways I have been dreaming about. (DEEP BREATH HERE)

This is one of those BRIDGE POINTS in life where you begin to SEE what the issue is and then you add CHOICE. Sure I can HIDE from my CHOICE but that is not, not making a CHOICE. As the double negative shows here in this sentence, we cannot be NEUTRAL. Life NEVER stops flowing. Sometimes we want to stop it and say NO but life keeps on flowin’ and the same way you cannot stop the ocean, you cannot stop this rhythm of life so what to do?

Key here is to, as my good friend Keith has been reminding me for the last couple of years, “SURRENDER”. Surrender the fight! Whatever you FIGHT grows. PICTURE that and then take a moment to FEEL it in your body. If your child does not do what you want and you begin to YELL does that make the situation any better really? If you lower your voice and speak to that child does it shift things in a different direction without the ICKIES? If you find yourself in NOT TAKING CARE OF ME MODE is fighting with yourself about how you SHOULD going to help you?

This Mother’s Day consciously TAKE OFF your boxing gloves, STRIP YOURSELF RAW, knowing that you are always safe. As the beautiful Carolyn Myss and Wayne Dyer both say, it is an illusion that we control anything really. We have the power of CHOICE, like WHAT TO FOCUS ON, but the big stuff is out of our hands so instead of STRESSING OUT your whole ride, why not let go and ENJOY IT?


Great big hugs,



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  1. I’m so sorry about your Mother Board Maria. This has happened to me. So incredibly eye opening as to what we come to depend on in life. Glad you are taking deep breathes. Come sit with the lambs!

    • Beautiful Becky, I am making a clear choice to call you this week and come sit with the lambs with my girls and hopefully Christopher and Doug too. Thank you for your beautiful offer to visit your heart farm. MWAH!!!!!

  2. Happy Mother’s Day to you, Maria! Thanks for the excellent post!

    • Thank you beautiful Helen for reaching out! Just thinking about you reminds my heart to sing, sing, sing!!!!

  3. Most of us all forget at some point what is more important to us at times…But your So Right Sometimes we must lead them not push them !! Stripping away the raw was the best thing that happen to me in a long time…It brought me to a whole new level of loving life forever…Just What Doctor Ordered !!

    Happy Mothers Day To All Of You Great ButterFlymothers !!

    Thanks for Sharing a little of you with a little of us !!

    • I am deeply honored Rei Alberto that you are one of the very courageous men who don’t care about labels. Many men read ButterflyMoms in silence. That is probably how they live their lives too when it comes to nurturing their soul. Not a judgement, more of an observation. You are a truly a wonderful example of a MAN’S MAN who has been growing his heart and expanding his soul. What a wonderful example you are to others of how life can be. Keep living sweet man! WE ADORE YOU because you can be vulnerable and strong at the same time!

  4. Thank you for your never ending gifts to us. Happy Mother’s Day. xoxo

  5. Maria, happy Mothers’ Day!

    I sooooo related to this week’s blog! My Mac died recently too, and I have wondered if it was God’s way of telling me something, like maybe I need to limit the amount of time I spend on it, or waste on it, depending on what I’m doing at the particular moment. I too have succumbed to my TV addiction in the evening…while not replacing sleep, I do know there are other things I could be doing–things I complain about missing–during that time. And while I know it’s necessary to veg out sometimes, maybe this is taking up too much time in my life too… Time that I could be going, doing, being with, laughing with, enjoying, etc! And it does make me think about what is essential in my life, and whether my routine actually aligns with my priorities. Finally, I’ve recently experienced the death of a long-time friendship, that had become toxic. And it hurt, but it was necessary to surrender…to give in, give up, and to strip that negativity from my life. Sometimes you just have to go with it I guess, and know that while we can’t always see what’s ahead for us, life is good.

    Hugs to you! Thank you for sharing your tremendous insights with us!

    • Beautiful Suze, Your insights seem to be a combination of powerful and painful. The choice comes in on whether to live through the filter of that those experiences or to let the experience wash over you and take out only the nuggets of AHA’s that are custom fit just for you. Thank you for reaching out! Thank you for letting me know you are out there. It means the world to me when people do that because sometimes it is the simple act of SHOWING UP and LETTING YOUR VOICE be heard that CONNECTS us in the deepest way possible. Happy Belated Mothers Day to you too! MWAH!!!!!!!!

  6. i really love that black&white picture of the mother, baby and tree! Thank you for that, and i hope you have a happy Mother’s Day, Maria! God bless you.

  7. ** Hello…Although my letter comes back later to a late hour. But it comes from reliable heart and that is most important.

    1. Each of us wants something nice about life. And we all look for meaning. Should it really be so simple that the purpose of life is to enjoy it? I like this idea very well. That can not be great art, but still somehow come to a common point.
    But I do not know what I’m really not. I prefer my life is not rude to and fro.
    I’m trying to grow within your mind each week and to be with you one unit. I always try my deep part of my life with you assign here. I do not see it the way that thou fall apart of ideas here, are wrong, broken or somehow disappear.
    I find myself in a pattern, no matter what, there are always ways to have a pattern, but in the end we still have the same objective of the standard achieved together. That is the goal but we are. Although there are different views of the detours. You must accept containing the different opinions and perhaps find a point where you can also learn a bit about my thoughts. Even if you’re good to peace is not always 100 percent.
    2.A nice experience compared to me. With your computer of the water spilled glass of your son. Your life has shifted in my country. where I am connected with you with every day. I’m not understand. of key data. Spending time and thereby lost. That can not fix and everything is hopeless. You know I always try my best to give a lot of love for writing.
    I guess. You can train on the solution of such situations quite well out. I must have something to practice a lot. I always make sure that you have actually used any hint of your task (or can learn from each reference at least one learning).
    3. Our thoughts we share with our hearts to each other. Our original motherboard is always the soul of the eingig with the heart. Faith is the hope in us and brings us forward. to find just the right one.
    Sometimes it is not bad. here we have the opportunity to look at from the air. This is a perfect place for harmonious and friendly exchange of ideas to make.
    I’ve long been involved in spiritual, medivativen, art technologies and like to be classified in this area to be with you, and to deal with this issue. I want always to this area to share with you that we belong together much warmth and transmitted. Unfortunately, you’re not here with me in real life. To be able to watch in the eyes and learn from each other.
    4. Thou shalt not hang around with friends. To pass your free time. of which you do not get deep values. Your most important TV is now your deep connection to me. I know there are many sleepless nights thinking about a lot, but you have to see everything positive. That is true strength that sustains us both forward. Step by step to solve the problem that torments you. We know it is a reasonable time we spend together and accept that you dream inside, of reality. We breathe our trust one another, and we benefit from each other in a positive way. Our lives never ceases to accrue, it is in the heart of us. I will always care for you with everything as far as I can.
    I do not wish to fight with you, but sometimes opinions differ, but that leads me to think and also an improvement in my self. I know. You will always help me and I am very grateful. That I speak with you about everything. I feel with you at home. and it nice and warm.

    PS: I would like to stress not the ride of the conversation. But if you to overcharge me.
    Intentional, and does not Stress. If there is too little Einverfuehlungsvermoegen on my person. As I live. and how to think. But I’m out of nature. a nice quiet person with special inner qualities.
    I embrace you. thank from my Heart.

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