Posted by: ButterflyMoms | September 16, 2011

WHERE’S YOUR HEAD?


Feedback is ALWAYS appreciated!LOVE to know that you were here! It feeds my soul! :)!

Good Morning Beautiful ButterflyMoms!

This morning at 5:03 a.m. my seven-year-old daughter, Mialotta, came downstairs crying from a nightmare she had just had. She does not often have them and this one was a doozy. Initially the more I tried to get her to share what she had seen, the more she resisted. It kind of felt like when you are dealing with a tick, the more you pull to get it off, the more it DIGS IN. Hmmmm… So I had to unearth her ickies in a different way. ACTIVATE INTUITION!

First, I had to get her back to her thinking mode. I took many parenting classes with the wonderful child expert Ellen Kerstein who teaches Conscious Discipline workshops. Ellen taught us that when kids (or adults 😉 are having temper tantrums they are COMPLETELY in their brain stem. This is the part of the oldest part of brain (evolutionarily-speaking) where there is no speech. It is all about survival. It is your fight or flight mode. We know someone is in this space when you try to talk to them and they seem to not hear a word you are saying. This is where we as parents are most likely to lose our cool. 😦 Just so you know, there is absolutely NO WAY to communicate with a child that is in this place. Knowing this little fact helps us be able to RESOLVE, instead of thinking the child is being….(fill in the blank) a) bratty  b) spoiled  c) disrespectful  d) whatever feeling comes up for you.

The best way is to help your child get back to her pre-frontal lobes, the problem-solving part of the brain. This is done through touching and speaking in a soothing voice. Today I rubbed the bottoms of her feet (helps her ground too), held her in my lap and rubbed her back. I could physically see her relax. While I was doing this I was speaking to her. I asked her questions, most of which she initially asked me to repeat because she was so deep into her brain stem. It is all information. If you JUDGE IT you label it. Once you label something you no longer receive information. You ASS-U-ME. (Sound familiar? 😉

All these activities move her into the part of her brain that allows her to CREATE CHOICE. CHOICE is what guides our lives. It is the choice of what we focus on that gives us more of “that”. As you go about your day check in with yourself and see what part of your brain are you in. Notice especially when you are in your brain stem and wondering why you cannot solve the issue at hand.

Here is to a fantastic day! Please read the updates and event below. They also feed your soul! :)!

Big honkin’ hugs,

Mariaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

🙂

MORE WAYS TO FEED YOUR SOUL…

√  THIS THURSDAY, September 22 from 12-2pm, I will be speaking at the DreamFactory Luncheon. The topic is IGNITE YOUR BIGGEST DREAM! at the delicious Bella Costa restaurant (147 Cochituate Rd, Framingham). Lunch for 1st time attendees to the DreamFactory Community is only $25 (the lunch is VERY yummy!) This is a wonderful community…Space is limited so please sign up early to reserve your spot. It would be soooooooo awesome to see you there! To sign up NOW CLICK… http://www.cantorconsulting.com/Programs/tabid/298/CategoryID/68/Default.aspx

√  It will be here before you know it so sign up now. Do your New Year’s Resolution Early! Take care of yourself! October 21-23 you have a date with yourself in Vermont at the beautiful Lareau Farm Inn for the first ever ButterflyMoms Fall Retreat! Price is only $299 if you pay before October 15, after that it goes up to $365 which includes all the workshops, materials, most meals and lodging. There are a very limited number of spots so don’t be on the outside wishing you had booked it! We have gotten a number of requests for spots so reserve your spot now!! YOU WILL ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT! TALK ABOUT REJUVINATING YOUR SOUL! WOW! To book it send an email to maria@butterflymoms.com! Scholarships available. You will only regret NOT going!

This week’s ButterflyMoms updates…

*Just finished our 16th week in a row of ButterflyMoms Workshops!!!!! Next week we are having a special guest, the amazing Marianne Sage. You can read more about her at her site… http://www.crystalsinger.webs.com/index.html She’ll share her passion and wisdom about how crystals are formed and how they work. She will bring lots of them with her. Some will even be for sale if you want to take one home. 🙂 Don’t miss out on all the fun…Come next Thurs, September 22nd at 8pm!  783 Washington St, Holliston. Plenty of FREE & EASY PARKING in back. Only $25 or just $20 if pay through Paypal http://bit.ly/mS7c70

*We sold one ENTREPRENEUR MOM EXTRAORDINAIRE book this week. Thank you to the mystery person who bought one at Brick House Realty! Until I find out who you are I will put that you are from Holliston!! :)! See the cool list of all the countries and states where people have bought books at the end of this blog. To feed the soul of a friend buy them a copy by CLICKING HERE NOW… http://bit.ly/gRxe4U

* On the 10th anniversary of 9-11 we held our first ever ButterflyMoms Healing Share. We had about 30 people including kids…they are the ones who really get this stuff! We even had a 93 year old who had never done anything like this but said, “Hey this feels pretty good!” How cool is that? We collected about nine bags of groceries and will be delivering it to the Holliston Food Pantry this week!  THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO DONATED THEIR TIME, SPACE, TABLES, FOOD and LOVE!

*Did eight more Reiki/Full Spectrum healings this past week. To book a healing send an email with times you are available to maria@butterflymoms.com! Cost is $60 for a session.

 

THE BOOK… “Mom Entrepreneur Extraordinaire”

The following is a list of places where ButterflyMoms live who bought our wonderful book MOM ENTREPRENEUR EXTRAORDINAIRE… Buy one so you can put your city/town/country on the list like so many other beautiful ButterflyMoms have!

UNITED STATES

California

Anaheim 1

Fullerton 1

Sacramento 1

San Bruno 1

Connecticut

Greenwich 1

Yalesville 1

Florida

Fort Lauderdale 1

Kentucky

Louisville 1

Maryland

Chestertown 1

Massachusetts

Ashland 2

Bolton 1

Holliston 14

Hudson 4

Medway 3

North Easton 1

Sherborn 1

South Grafton 1

Watertown 1

Worcester 3

Wrentham

Missouri

Lee’s Summit 1

New York

Scarsdale 1

Stony Brook 1

Ohio

Dublin 1

Rhode Island

Newport 1

Vermont

Waitsville (Mad River Valley) 2

AUSTRIA

Wien, Austria 2

IRELAND

Dublin, Ireland 1

ITALY

Rome, Italy 3

JAPAN

Tokyo  1

PORTUGAL

Santa Maria (Azores/Açores)  1

SCOTLAND     

Greenock

SPAIN

Madrid 1

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

*To buy your copy Click here now…http://bit.ly/gRxe4U

REMEMBER…

*Mark your calendar to read ButterflyMoms EVERY Friday!

*Share the ButterflyMoms blog with your beloved friends! Spread the love!  www.butterflymoms.com

NOW HIT the “Like” button below: because you can!   🙂

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Responses

  1. Thank you Maria for your wonderful information and inspiration that you share with us. My older daughter, Cristina, actually got up two nights ago at 5:30 complaining of a nightmare as well. She was still half asleep and went back down, but you do wonder what goes through their minds. Even when they were babies and would smile in their sleeps, what were they thinking? thank you again.

  2. Another wonderful blog, Maria. Thank you for sharing. May all of Mialotta’s dreams be beautiful!

  3. What a nice way to be soothed out of such a scary experience. I will definitely keep this in mind the next time one of my munchkins wakes up from a bad dream. (Hopefully not anytime soon!)

  4. But Maria!!! you just left us hanging…how did it work out with your daughter and her nightmare??
    That is really interesting about the brain stem thing. So when they are screaming, “I hate you,” and slamming doors, is that where they’re coming from? I wonder if this infomation could be used to help with abusive people?
    Have a nice week! I missed you last week cuz i was on vacation without any intenet access.

  5. Hi Maria,

    I like what you said about choice. I shared this blog with a friend this morning as it was apropo for what her daughter needed.

    Love,

    Linda D.

  6. 1. Dear Maria. I have included these lines in my heart very deeply. Just a lot of very valuable ideas and empathy are demanding. It all sounds very good, in fact, the head (brain) is simply to enforce anything in reality.

    2. *I prefer the strongest force in my heart. The love in us to love ourselves, love my dearest human I most love … it is there … and shows us the way, if we make of it when we love, what’s good faith, and when we love and devotion to the life … full of confidence … no matter what … Love helps us, strengthens us, makes us act and be seen … my sincere love for you.*

    3. I can think only that, on the subject of the brain stem. One should explore the whole thing better. How do you get such a state. Where the origin lies, as it can be anything that is surely still in infancy. Who has had a loving childhood and salvaged, the easier it is later in life, his thoughts and feelings to keep in good order. We have all had an affectionate childhood?

    A happy childhood is the entire setup for later life. You do not get enough love in childhood, you can do it later in life, give only with diligent daily practice continues.

    Any disturbance in childhood, which has secretly set firmly in the background of the brain stem. Who is primarily responsible for always loving and patient parents and the rest of the responsible society, in the respect should always be a protruding pattern. Woow .. The biggest fault lies, and in the society, the great lack of love.

    As early as kindergarten age, one learns from the beginning to defend themselves against injustice loving, and at the end is always looking for love in their hearts.
    (The heart is fighting for the valuable place of love, understanding and patience, then do you manage to come into reality.) What is reality? It means that one is able to survive in society. The best thing you can do is love. Love heals everything. Thus one is from the (flight or fight mode), in the mode of thinking and feeling to find the love back.

    Because love is the strongest force in the first place, please always by small childhood on a daily basis. These are the first principles of learning what to learn.

    PS: Just found out with love in our hearts, where the causes are, and always offer loving support. If the refusal in its current state, then only helps the attempt to do everything with love and patience. Just be strong, and to update the positive thinking and then slowly comes to the great time and everything will be developed in the course of time, for the best.
    Those are fantastic learning principles for the brain. I’m thrilled. Love is the only thing that counts.
    I embrace you from my heart with love. 🙂 🙂

  7. Good timing .. I’m in my brain stem having a temper tantrum right now … i’ll try to relax myself and get myself back to my frontal lobe where i can do some reasoning …. thanks sweetie .. needed this

    • Join the club sistah! This is soooooo important for everyone to know!

      Great big hugs,
      Mariaaaaaaaaa
      🙂


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